News : CDRC in the News
The Elder As PeacemakerSeptember 18th, 2008
by Jeff Shepardson
Orginally published in the Ithaca Journal
Wouldn’t it be nice if there was a retirement age for conflict? Wouldn’t it be something to look forward to if, at age 65, life automatically became harmonious and peaceful? Of course, we know, that’s just wishful thinking and if anything, sometimes just the opposite it true! The process of aging, with all of its unique and often challenging transitions, can be a prime time for conflict and strife. No one is immune to conflict, not even our elders.
The Community Dispute Resolution Center has been in the business of peace-making in the Tompkins County now for 25 years! One of our core beliefs informs us that all people, no matter what age, have inherent capacities for both self-determined choice and responsiveness to others. These two needs are what allow us to flourish, keeping us supported by and accountable to each other while allowing our own unique skills and attributes to contribute to the community of which we are a part. This is true for young and old alike.
But occasionally our relationships can become strained and disrupted and a crisis in our interaction with another person can cause us to feel cut off from that person, alienated from and ultimately distrustful of each other. When conflict compromises the integrity of our relationships, it also compromises the integrity of our identity and autonomy. We an become confused, unable to understand and unresponsive to those with whom we disagree. And this happens to people of all ages, too.
For the last 25 years, CDRC has offered mediation, facilitation, education and training in Tompkins, Chemung and Schuyler counties. But, in the last four years, CDRC has also committed itself to becoming a resource for elders and their families, friends and care-givers through a new mediation program called Wise Talk. This service provides the opportunity for senior adults and those who love and care for them to come together around those uniquely difficult conversations and tough situations they may face. CDRC has opened 65 cases for elders and their families in homes across Tompkins and Chemung Counties in the last two years. Many of the cases have involved a large number of people, including parents, adult siblings, extended family, neighbors, friends and others. The issues being mediated have included future living arrangements, financial planning and estate transfer issues, end-of-life planning, neighbor disputes, landlord – tenant disputes, and interpersonal disputes, among others.
So, in celebration of CDRC’s 25 years of service here in Tompkins County, and with the goal of highlighting our elder mediation program Wise Talk, CDRC is marking its 25th Anniversary Celebration with a gala event at the Museum of the Earth on Tuesday, October 21st, 2008 from 5:30pm to 8:30pm.
Our key note speaker at the festivities will be Dr. William Thomas, world-renowned writer, speaker and author of his most recent book What Are Old People For? How Elders Will Save the World. Dr. Thomas’ address at the event will highlight his conviction that the elder as peacemaker is part of the answer to the needs of any community.
“We live in an exciting time. There is a new old age waiting to be discovered, ready to be explored. Aging, and the aged, are not, as so often supposed, the cause of our problems, they are and always have been the source of the answers we need. Our longevity is waiting to be freed from the shackles of prejudice and fear. It can and will save our world.”
Dr. William Thomas, M.D.
Dr. Thomas has been instrumental in challenging our culture to rethink the value of the elderly in our midst as persons who have a unique function to contribute for the benefit of all. One of those functions is peace-maker.
If you are interested in learning more about our elder mediation program, Wise Talk, or if you would like to register for CDRC’s 25th anniversary celebration at the Museum of the Earth, please contact CDRC at 607-273-9347.
